DYNAMITE! #191, 25.07.08

November 14, 2010

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DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #191, 25.07.08
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+++ Having a blast every Friday +++ Dyna-mail race reports, news, views, and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk +++ Have a peek at our pics -http://tinyurl.com/k34tf +++ Check out DYNAMITE! on the web -http://tinyurl.com/36xkay +++ WEEKEND WEATHER: Sat, light showers, 25C max, wind S 5mph; Sun, heavy showers, 26C max, wind SE 3mph +++
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DYNAM-EYE-TIE
+++ Italians treat DYNAMITE! as one of their own +++
Waiting in a starting pen among thousands of Italy’s brashest amateur cyclists is enough to make a humble Englishman feel quite insignificant – and DYNAMITE! felt even more anonymous than usual while standing in close proximity to an inquisitive RICHARD ‘AV IT’ HOULT moments before the Granfondo Pinarello got underway, chiefly because he was asking DAVID ‘GOLIATH’ ANDREWS: “Who’s the guy that writes the newsletter?” Altogether now, Dynamates: he’s behind you! The name of the person currently sitting at this keyboard was later incorrectly outed by ROB ‘LICENCE’ REID, who told PAUL ‘ALL BLUE’ HARKNETT that he thought the author of Britain’s top Dynamatic update was fellow GF Pinny rider CHRIS ‘VAN CHADDERS’ CHAPMAN. And there was further confusion when, on four separate occasions, we were forced to explain to surprised Italians speaking to us in their native tongue that we weren’t one of the locals. Was it the tan and good looks that confused them? Even if it was, how on earth could they overlook the word “London” emblazoned 13 times across the UK’s snazziest cycle kit? In a more curious case of mistaken identity, ROB ‘THE SAINT’ JEFFROY was listed as 173rd among the 1,433 finishers, despite not taking part – and the 3rd-best finisher of the 27 ‘Mos in Sunday’s sportive didn’t appear on the results at all. Conspiracy or cock-up? Come with us now as we investigate…

REID ROBBED
+++ Technological error blamed for Scot’s disappearance +++
Having taken up a sizable chunk of Da Pino restaurant’s outdoor seating area, dozens of famished Dynamos were tucking into their pre-sportive fuelling session on a balmy Saturday evening when RICHARD ‘AV IT’ HOULT turned up at Treviso’s main piazza looking worse for wear, having just done half of the 124-mile Pinarello course with his pal ANDREW ‘RECCE’ ELLIS – but the compact ball of Dyna-muscle made a sufficient recovery to post a sub-six hour time the following day, making him the fastest ‘Mo at the club’s 2008 sportive. Ravaged Rich arrived at the finish in a furious state after the riders in his select group forced him to do his turns and then gave him a verbal bashing when it became clear he was running on empty. The rotters! Fellow big-hitter GUY ‘THE ENGINE’ POWDRILL crossed the line just over a minute later nursing a bruise on his bottom, which came as a result of rashly trying to emulate the Italians’ Savoldelli-like descending skills on the other side of the first climb… http://tinyurl.com/5b3syq …although the pleasure of briefly riding with Mr Gino Pinarello himself must have helped ease the pain. The cheeky late booker nabbed ROB ‘THE SAINT’ JEFFROY’s entry, which is why the injured ‘Mo’s name appears on the results instead of Guysie – and spare a thought for ROB ‘LICENCE’ REID, who completed the testing 122-mile course in 6hrs 5mins but was nowhere to be seen on the list of finishers due to his timing chip failing to work. Co-incidentally, the formerly unlicensed Scot had forgotten his laminated BCF card and had to ring the federation’s Manchester HQ to get the necessary paperwork sent to the granfondo’s organisers before he arrived at the starting pen, so let’s hope his omission from the list was not the revenge of a petty Italian bureaucrat rather then a technological gaffe. Stats-mad NICK ‘CRIKEY’ DOVE estimates that Dynamo would probably have been elevated from 6th to 5th in the team competition had Rob’s time been included – and as the former City analyst was astute enough to spot a minor error in the official course profile, who are we to argue? But at least the prize for 6th – an alu Opera frame and carbon fork – wasn’t too bad. Now it’s just a question of deciding who it should go to!

COULDN’T CARE LES
+++ Hemmant senior bosses dad +++
Treviso’s enthusiastic motorists certainly made their presence felt during the pre- and post-sportive rides lead by trip organiser SAM ‘EPIC’ WOODHOUSE, with ALEX ‘BUSTED’ BASTIN losing a spoke in his front Ksyrium and grazing his arm after the group braked sharply to avoid a car driving rather too close for comfort on Friday afternoon. Part of the problem was trying to find quiet roads – so hats off to human sat nav JOE ‘BLOW’ HEMMANT, who took a small group out on a pleasant, sun-kissed, incident-free jaunt to the final climb on the granfondo route using only village names scribbled on his forearm as a guide. The progenitor of Joe and TOM ‘HUMBLE’ HEMMANT was one of the riders on the brief trip – and his eldest son ordered him to “put your lid on, Les” as the helmet-free sixtysomething prepared to descend the Montello. Hemmant père’s weary response? “Yes, dad.” Joe and MARK ‘PACEY’ LACEY went on to ride the Pinny at a leisurely pace with the former physics teacher. For the sake of Mr Hemmant’s sanity, we hope his eldest was a little less bossy!

A NAZI BUSINESS
+++ Check out Treviso’s unusual sights +++
Returning briefly to the Da Pino, a few ‘Mos were intrigued to see that the restaurant’s “English menu” included a pizza called the “Inglesina”, topped with that quintessentially British combination of roast beef and tomato sauce. Why didn’t they just slap curry and chips on top as well? Sadly, nobody ordered it, and we omitted to take a photograph of this unusual entry on the bill of fare. There was, however, plenty of curious sights in Treviso captured on the DYNAMITE! box brownie, including a poster advertising a human-sized kebab, a shop specialising in massive serial-killer knives, and an outlet offering Nazi memorabilia a stone’s throw from the two hotels where the Dynamo crew were staying. Plus (how could we forget?) there’s a graphic photo of GUY ‘THE ENGINE’ POWDRILL wielding a creamy treat. Take a look at our gallery… http://tinyurl.com/6nbvdm …if you think you can stomach it!

ARE YOU GUINEA COME?
+++ Last call for Summer Social +++
On a final note regarding the hugely successful Pinny trip, the dozens of Dynamates who went on the group outing will no doubt want to raise a glass to hard-working SAM ‘EPIC’ WOODHOUSE for his sterling organisation of this year’s Dynamo sportive, which was his last as sportivist-in-chief before he jets off to Switzerland to start a new job. And there’s no better place to drink to his future than the Guinea pub near Green Park Tube… http://tinyurl.com/5fwlg9 …which plays host to the Dynamo Summer Social on Thursday. Event organiser PAUL ‘ALL BLUE’ HARKNETT has revealed that the committee has arranged for a tab behind the bar, so leave a post on his thread… http://tinyurl.com/6hpmm6 …to confirm that you’re coming. The evening starts at 6pm with a king-sized table booked for pizzas at 8.30. We’ll see you there!

MAIDEN VICTORY
+++ Beaumont takes first win +++
Swedish sensation TORKEL ‘REDTOP’ DOHMERS clinched 4th at the 3/4 Terry Cronin race on Saturday, while CHARLIE ‘VICI’ BLACKMAN, REBECCA ‘WHIRLIGIG’ CURLEY, CLAIRE BEAUMONT and debut competitor ANTONIA DE BARTON-WATSON dominated the women’s event on the Hillingdon circuit by taking 1st, 2nd, 5th and 8th respectively…. Charlie and Rebecca beat Olympic-bound triathlete Emma Davis… http://tinyurl.com/5ads7b …and Claire’s placing came a week after her victory in the Chertsey MoD women’s race, which saw her attack with four laps to go before dropping back and capitalizing on a gap to the right on the finishing straight. Blocked-in MELISSA GILLIAN took 7th – and Claire says of her first-ever victory: “As I sprinted clear I was too nervous to sit up and cheer, so I just kept going until I saw the line pass under me. I wasn’t wearing Dynamo kit because I missed the last sale, but after the race Charlie handed me a jersey and shorts so I can now be a proper Dynamo.” Just make sure you show off your new top by giving the classic two-handed salute next time you’re 1st!

CIAO, BELLA
We’ve reached the ultimo chilometro, which means there is just time to thank everyone who sent stuff in for this issue before we scoff the last slice of treacle tart from the well-stocked feeding zone. Always remember we would be an empty piazza if it wasn’t for you, our gathering throng. So please keep Dyna-mailing your race reports, news and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk. The deadline, as ever, is Wednesday afternoon for Friday’s edition. And now, as we head for the pasta party in the finishers’ enclosure, it only remains for us to remind you about…

THIS WEEK’S RIDES

SATURDAY
8.30am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps
split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

SUNDAY
8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, south side, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and a wavy fork.

WEDNESDAY
7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride to Chertsey, back via Weybridge, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team.

THE SMALL PRINT
Granfondo Pinarello, Treviso, Italy, Sunday 20 July, 124 miles: 152 Richard Hoult, 05:58:44; 173 Guy Powdrill, 05:59:49; 228 Rob Reid, 06:05:00; 339 Edwin Datson, 06:16:39; 367 David Andrews, 06:20:37; 410 Chris Chapman, 06:22:23; 485 Paul Drake, 06:32:03; 519 Nick Dove 06:34:33; 569 Elliott Katz, 06:41:12; 573 Martin Haenlein, 06:41:13; 615 Paul Harknett, 06:42:19; 638 Andrew Ellis 06:47:35; 661 Jamie Jenkins, 06:50:57; 699 Piers Constable, 06:51:48; 706 Alex Bastin, 06:51:48; 841 Robin Osborne, 07:07:39; 853 Chris Campbell, 07:07:49; 948 Charlie Pearch, 07:15:51; 1085 Nick Franzini, 07:29:05; 1123 Ralph Carter, 07:37:19; 1144 Andrew Davis, 07:37:28; 1196 Terry Bishop, 07:43:44; 1245 Sam Woodhouse, 07:51:03; 1346 Peta McSharry, 08:19:32; 1404 Joe Hemmant 08:51:20; 1405 Mark Lacey 08:51:21; 1406 Mark Irvine 08:51:21.

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