DYNAMITE! #193, 08.08.08

November 14, 2010

DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #193, 08.08.08
+++ Having a blast every Friday +++ Dyna-mail race reports, news, views, and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk +++ Have a peek at our pics -http://tinyurl.com/k34tf +++ Check out DYNAMITE! on the web -http://tinyurl.com/36xkay +++ WEEKEND WEATHER: Sat, light showers, 20C max, wind SW 16mph; Sun, heavy rain, 20C max, wind SW 15mph +++

+++ Beijing bigwig fills suitcase a week before flight +++
The words “commitment” and “committee” have long been synonymous for the dedicated crew that governs Britain’s hardest-working cycling club – but jet-setting Dynamo captain TONY ‘PEEETEEER’ SMEDLEY went even further beyond the call of duty than usual when he flew back from New York on Thursday just so he could stand in a cobbled Mayfair street with a pint glass in hand,
chatting about stem lengths, the 11-speed Super Record groupset, and why on earth MARTIN ‘COMEBACK’ GARRATT is on the verge of possessing Colnago’s ludicrously-named Extreme Power. That’s right, Dynamates – the allure of a free bar in a small, delightfully secluded boozer near Grosvenor Square proved irresistible for the Dynamo top dog, not to mention the dozens of ‘Mos who turned up at the Guinea in Bruton Street for PAUL ‘ALL-BLUE’ HARKNETT’s latest bash, which many agreed was the best Dynamatic get-together thus far. In what could have been interpreted as a move to show Tony who has the most air miles, ever-competitive Olympic official ALEX ‘BALFIE’ BALFOUR trundled a suitcase packed with gear from the office that the Beijing-bound big lad needed for his imminent trip, while pseudo-pro GUY ‘THE ENGINE’ POWDRILL provoked envy and astonishment with details of his hectic riding schedule since taking gardening leave. Guysie’s former colleague DAVID ‘DORIAN’ STREULE managed to tear himself away from the Ikea shelving unit he was constructing and get to the Pizza Express where the rowdy, hungry throng had decamped for the second part of the evening – and the baby-faced bopper ensured there was a third stage by going for a dance at a nearby bar with TOBY ‘IS IT ‘COS I IS’ BLACKMAN, REBECCA ‘WHIRLIGIG’ CURLEY, DAVID ‘PINKY’ GARDNER, STUART ‘EASY’ SPIES and Balfie. Non-drinker Rebecca stuck to Diet Cokes, although she was later spotted with a slice of lemon stuck in her gob like a boxer’s mouthguard mere seconds after Dave Gardner bought a round of tequilas. What a remarkable coincidence! Streuley left relatively early, perhaps saving his energy for a clandestine competition organized by the rowing fraternity – so come with us now for a little-known time trial near a familiar café. Let’s see who’s first to the bridge…

+++ Time trialling claims another ‘Mo +++
From the moment he rolled up his sleeves to do the washing up at a Dynamo Beginners’ Series race, it became clear that CHARLES ‘POTS’ PEACH was a thoroughly nice and sociable chap – but now, many years after his impromptu pan-diving at the old Hillingdon club hut, it appears his sunny disposition could soon be blighted forever as he becomes sucked into the misery-inducing milieu of the pointy hat brigade. It has emerged that cheery Charlie pulled a respectable 34:20 on the 26-mile Staplefield course on Saturday – and his namesake, having been unable to get to the Surrey League event, got her TT fix on Tuesday instead with her oar-tugging chums from Vesta. Ex-rower CHARLIE ‘VICI’ BLACKMAN came 4th at the little-known boaters’ event in Richmond Park, posting a time of 8:04 on the out-and-back course from the bridge to the Star and Garter roundabout. Former paddle-wielder DAVID ‘DORIAN’ STREULE beat her by a mere second, while guest non-rower RICHARD ‘PLACING’ MASON claimed the No.15 spot on his fixed. The fastest time was posted by a Krankie, although the results do not reveal if it was wee Jimmy or “his” husband… http://tinyurl.com/5sbac4. Fandabidozi!

+++ Two Dynamo victories in three days +++
In a valiant effort to take TOM ‘HUMBLE’ HEMMANT’s crown for modesty, self-effacing RICHARD ‘AV IT’ HOULT has falsely attributed his stellar performance on the Benenden circuit to the ingestion of seven pre-race espressos, a Viper bar, and a patch of diesel which caused a crash in the bunch just as he bridged across to a promising lead group – but the truth is it was sheer, raw, unbridled Dynamo power that drove the compact ball of Dyna-muscle to victory on Sunday after he and Rapha’s Matt Seaton dropped the rest of the break prior to being joined by Dulwich Paragon big-hitter Dan Felstead, who completed the podium line-up. Two days after his win at the 1/2/3 event in Rolvenden, Kent, the City wonderboy was toiling away at Hillingdon helping PAUL ‘MONTY’ DELAHUNTY, TORKEL ‘REDTOP’ DOHMERS, DYLAN ‘GORDON-A-LIKE’ KENNEWAY, ROBIN ‘OSSIE’ OSBORNE, GAVIN ‘NO LYIN’ RYAN and Tom pull back a break of three containing dangerman Rob Enslin, only for a touch of wheels on the last lap to end Rich’s race. He escaped with only his shoes damaged – so it was left to Paul to bag the second Dynamo win of the week as he activated his trademark jump for the sprint, while Gav nabbed 6th place. Lovely teamwork, fellas!

+++ Unkindest cut for Rapha man’s big plan +++
News has reached our famous soundproof bunker that Dynamo founding father Guy Andrews has been in negotiations to publish (we kid you not) a daily cycling-based newspaper for a limited period – but he faced a setback this week after the powers-that-be got cold feet about his ambitious idea. By a strange coincidence, Mrs Dynamite snapped an intriguing-looking shop in Hounslow which appeared to indicate that the frustrated Rouleur editor has now chosen to ditch the world of bicycles altogether, although the antiquated phone number in the top right hand corner indicates the business has been a going concern for quite some time… http://tinyurl.com/6ngl9r. But there’s no doubting what would be the follically-challenged hardman’s signature cut: it’s a short back and sides, and bald on top!

+++ Woodhouse heads for Switzerland +++
On a final note, DYNAMITE! would like to wish SAM ‘EPIC’ WOODHOUSE a safe journey as he prepares to up sticks for Geneva next week. The East Molesey man will be motoring through France in a Luton van with removal helpers ROBIN ‘OSSIE’ OSBORNE, who is taking over from Sam as the committee’s sportive organiser, and DAVID ‘GOLIATH’ ANDREWS. Get him there in one piece, chaps – and the same goes for his full carbon ‘cross bike!

Like ALEX ‘BALFIE’ BALFOUR’s suitcase, this edition has now been filled to bursting point – which means there’s just enough time to thank everyone who sent stuff in for this issue before we sit on the lid and try to zip it up. Always remember would be an empty case without you to provide the contents, so please keep Dyna-mailing your race reports, news and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk. The deadline, as ever, is Wednesday afternoon for Friday’s edition. And now, as the zipper jams, it only remains for us to remind you about…


8.30am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, south side, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and hand luggage (weight limit 10kg).

7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride to Chertsey, back via Weybridge, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team.

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