The DYNAMITE! Files

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DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #155, 17.08.07
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+++ Having a blast every Friday +++ Dyna-mail race reports, news, views, and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk +++ Have a peek at our pics – http://tinyurl.com/k34tf +++ Check out DYNAMITE! on the web – http://tinyurl.com/36xkay +++ WEEKEND WEATHER: Sat, light showers, 20C max, wind SW 12mph; Sun, heavy showers, 20C max, wind NW 1mph +++
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HE’S GONE STU FAR
+++ Spies completes maddest event ever +++
Many ‘Mos have amazed the DYNAMITE! editorial team over the years with their bonkers tales – but now STUART ‘EASY PEASY’ SPIES has proved he is the Dyna-maddest of the lot by surviving the Norseman Xtreme Tri in Eidfjord, Norway, which covers the distance of an Ironman event and adds 16,000ft of height gain just for the sheer hell of it. Readers who have yet to enjoy the screwy Saffa’s account of his deranged day should head over to the forum… http://tinyurl.com/ytptr7 …while any Dynamates looking for a less insane challenge can now sign up to JOE ‘BLOW’
HEMMANT’s domestic excursions, one of which was previewed in this publication last week… http://tinyurl.com/yu7g8o. But before you run off like a lunatic escaping the asylum, let’s find out which of Dynamo’s big-hitters was mad at himself for missing out on the top spot in West Sussex. It’s time to go insane with rage…

TRIAL AND TRIBULATION
+++ Simmonds miffed by 2nd place +++
He was a whopping 1min 50secs faster than last week’s Surrey League time trial winner GUY ‘THE ENGINE’ POWDRILL – but despite covering the testing 26-mile Staplefield course in 1:01:46, RICHARD ‘WIN ‘EM’ SIMMONDS ended up taking 2nd place at the final event in the mini-series on Saturday. Curses! Despite his intense displeasure at missing out on the top spot by 22 seconds, Rich’s performance was nevertheless part of a strong Dynamo outing which saw WILL ‘SEE YA’ HAYTER nab 5th with a time of 1:06:20, while GORDON ‘KEN-A-LIKE’ KENNEWAY partnered DAVID ‘PINKY’ GARDNER to take the No.5 spot in the two-up table, one place ahead of DAVID ‘DORIAN’ STREULE and RICHARD ‘PLACING’ MASON. Wonder women JENNY ‘J-LLOYD’ JONES and CHARLIE ‘VICI’ BLACKMAN beat the other ladies’ team by more than 16 minutes – and they saw off a male squad from Brighton in the process… http://tinyurl.com/you3df. You showed ’em, girls!

DOING IT THE MART WAY
+++ Williamson refuses to cheat at London Tri +++
Diligent rule-observer MARTIN ‘PIN-UP’ WILLIAMSON was pleased to see some top competitors getting busted for breaking the no-drafting edict at the London Triathlon a couple of weeks ago – and despite dropping back to avoid penalties on the 23.5-mile bike course, the Kingston hunk still managed to finish 5th in the sub-2:30 group with a time of 1:59:18. Interestingly, he appears to have beaten someone called James Cracknell, while the chap who came 1st is actually Third… http://tinyurl.com/2r8beo. That’s the wacky world of triathlon for you! Martin followed up his top five place by venturing to Nottingham last weekend for the National Relay Championships, where his four-man team emerged from the water in 16th place, moving up to 2nd during the run before finishing 4th overall. Martin reveals: “We pretty much only got beaten by people without jobs.” There should be a rule against them entering!

ROBIN’S ZEST
+++ Old-timer promoted +++
Fired-up fifty-something ROBIN ‘OSSIE’ OSBORNE was one point shy of promotion when he returned from holiday this week – so you can imagine his joy at earning a 3rd cat licence by taking 6th place at the Hillingdon 4th cat event on Tuesday. Well done, pal! Self-styled “old git” Rob reveals: “I’m pretty chuffed as this is my first year of racing at the tender age of 50. I had planned to learn to race this year and get my 3rd cat licence in 2008, so this is a mega bonus.” The Hillingdon hero will no doubt be tempted to take part in the big boys’ race, which this week saw PAUL ‘MONTY’ DELAHUNTY nab 4th… http://tinyurl.com/3azz23 …after a trio of Agiskoviner riders took the podium places amid atrocious weather conditions… http://tinyurl.com/2l4ky6. Water result!

WHAT’S SUP, DOC?
+++ Legendary ‘Mo reveals future plans over a coffee +++
On a final note, those who have been with the club since its inception may be interested to hear that DYNAMITE! came across none other than ‘MEDICAL’ MIKE DEBNEY supping a latte with a pal at the Fulham Palace Road branch of Starbucks on Wednesday evening. The winner of the very first Dynamo Beginners’ Series race and star of countless stellar performances revealed that he has left Redhill in Surrey to take up a post at nearby Charing Cross hospital, so you can expect to see the dazzling doc at a Parkride in the not-too-distant future. The comeback starts soon, Dynamates!

JACKET IN
The men in white coats are coming to take us away, which means there’s just enough time to thank everyone who sent in stuff for this issue before we’re strapped into a straitjacket. Always remember we are simply nuts about you, but we need our weekly Dyna-medication, so please keep Dyna-mailing your race reports, news and gossip to the address in the “from” field of this message – or simply hit your reply button. The deadline, as ever, is Wednesday afternoon for Friday’s edition. We’d like to offer crazy big thanks to CHARLIE ‘VICI’ BLACKMAN, DAVE ‘PINKY’ GARDNER, SAM ‘SLAM DUNK’ HUMPHESON, RICHARD ‘PLACING’ MASON, IAN ‘KING OF’ PAINE and JOE ‘CHEEKY BEGGAR STEGERS for turning up to marshal at the rained-off Crystal Palace races on Tuesday – and now, having tossed those wacky, soaking-wet kids a towel, it only remains for us to remind you about…

THIS WEEK’S RIDES

SATURDAY
9am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

SUNDAY
8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, south side, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and a cuckoo.

WEDNESDAY
7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride to Chertsey, back via
Weybridge, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team.

This entry was posted on November 15, 2010 at 5:55 pm and is filed under DYNAMITE! filed.