DYNAMITE! #120, 06.10.06

November 20, 2010

DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #120, 06.10.06
+++ Having a blast every Friday +++ Dyna-mail race reports, news, views, and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk +++ Have a peek at our pics – http://tinyurl.com/k34tf +++ Check out DYNAMITE! on the web – go to http://www.londondynamo.co.uk and click the “newsletter” link +++ WEEKEND WEATHER: Sat, sunny, 17C max, wind W 17mph; Sun, sunny intervals, 18C max, wind S 12mph +++

+++ ‘Mos in short film bit part +++
While the club’s big stars revel in the limelight, your ever-quiet DYNAMITE! proudly fulfils a non-speaking role in the sprawling Dyna-movie of the capital’s most cinematic cycling club – and we were pleased to play another vital bit part on Saturday at the filming of a Transport for London promotional video celebrating the capital’s participation in next year’s Tour De France. Along with DARREN ‘ICE’ HINCKS, who was cleverly disguised in an obscure Czech team’s kit, your favourite film extra spent a couple of hours gulping mouthfuls of dirty water sprayed up from the rain-slicked tarmac as we whizzed around the Inner Circle of Regents Park with around two dozen other soggy and dizzy riders. The things we do for the business we call show! An off-the-leash Labrador tried to grab some screen time by bringing down half-a-dozen riders after a couple of suicidal squirrels attempted to get in shot as the fast-moving group approached – but despite these animal-related obstacles, the finished product is now in the process of being put together, ready to be screened at the unveiling of the 2007 TdF route in Paris on 26th October. It will be interesting to see how the moviemakers will transform a wet autumn morning into a warm sunny day, particularly as the dirt-encrusted faces of the riders looked like they had just been through the business end of Paris-Roubaix rather than a mocked-up summer crit in the big smoke. The backroom boys may also have quite a job digitally erasing the individual hairs from the legs of the hirsute fella chosen to be the yellow jersey. There is even the possibility that DYNAMITE! may be reduced in the editing suite to a rapid blue blur – so let’s hope that TOM ‘JUNIOR’ MACKAY will give the club some exposure by starring in the short film as the young cyclist who chases a symbolic yellow balloon through the capital, beguiling many a Londoner during its journey, including a “mixed race couple enjoying a coffee at the NFT” as mentioned in the filmmakers’ intriguing synopsis. Somewhat confusingly, a little girl seemed to be playing the part of the young child on the day, so we hope Tom didn’t have to kneel down while wearing a dress for his time in front of the camera. You can see some pictures from the weekend’s shoot at the bottom of our Tired and Tested gallery… http://tinyurl.com/k34tf …which includes a photo of one of the exclusive lapel badges handed out to the participants, with Sash the Unofficial Newsletter Cat helpfully providing an impression of its size by placing her paw next to it. We’ve got three of these highly sought-after items which are not yet available to the general public, so send a Dyna-mail to us with “Grab a Badge” in the subject line if you want to be one of the mere 50,000 people who will eventually own a Grand Depart pin. For now, however, it’s time to shout “cut” on this opening item as we leave the comforting bubble of movieland and head into the real world, where a certain ‘Mo has been yelling louder than a bad-tempered director with a loudhailer. So come with us as we light a cigar and shift our bottom out of a folding canvas chair which has our name written on the back. It’s time to step out of the Winnebago…

+++ Cover your ears – Stronge is new Mainwaring +++
Pop in the earplugs, Dynamates! Sergeant Major ANDREW ‘COALFACE’ STRONGE is taking over from former club president Guy ‘Mainwaring’ Andrews as Dynamo’s top yeller if his vocal performance at the Surrey League’s 3/4 handicap is anything to go by. Fearing the 15-man 4th cat group would capitalise on its generous three-minute head start, the normally sedate chap pumped up the volume in a bid to get the 3rd cat chasing group working together from the gun. Thanks to his Dyna-motivational attitude, the 3rds caught the 4ths on the second of three laps on the 12.5-mile Alfold circuit – and despite eventual winner Marek Siwicki from Addiscombe getting away with a Southdown rider at the dying stages, Andy’s efforts at controlling the group for the lion’s share of the race were rewarded with 4th place. Well done, sir! Wednesday night regular Kevin Sparks, who pipped Andy to the line for 3rd, rode in Dynamo colours despite not being a member – and there was more controversy earlier on when he responded to ‘RADAR’ RUSS TURNER’s request to take his turn at the front with the following warning: “One more word and I swear I’m going to hit you.” Woah, fella! Thankfully, the Sparks didn’t fly any further and the two made up in the village hall’s car park afterwards. That’s the spirit, lads!

+++ ‘Mos undaunted by biblical shower +++
As peacemakers Russ and Kevin drove away their metaphorical storm clouds, the real things were gathering over Alfold where they broke in spectacular style on the first lap of the afternoon’s 2/3 race. Poor visibility caused by the biblical downpour inevitably lead to a series of gaps, one of which forced MARTIN ‘COMEBACK’ GARRATT to chase and then blow as the pack strung out shortly after he got back on. Unlucky, pal! Stunned RICHARD ‘PLACING’ MASON watched Richard Prebble launch his winning move, remarking: “He came past me like I wasn’t even moving.” That’s bound to knock to your confidence! The Pinarello fellow maintained a 25mph average speed to build up an astonishing five-minute advantage while Nigel Carpenter and John Wager time-trialled together for the next two podium places. The official results have yet to appear, but DYNAMITE! can exclusively reveal that GAVIN ‘NO LYIN’ RYAN came 5th, DAVID ‘DORIAN’ STREULE took 7th, Rich nabbed 8th and plucky ROB ‘THE SAINT’ JEFFROY managed to finish with the bunch. It will take more than a heavy dose of the wet stuff to stop Dynamo!

Our Equity card has expired, which means there’s just enough time to thank everyone who sent in stuff for this issue before a security guard ushers us out of the on-set catering van. Always remember we are a dizzy Maggie Jacobs, and it is our function to be a comedy companion for you, our Andy Millman. So please keep Dyna-mailing your race reports, news, gossip, and further sightings of the elusive KEN ‘BACKGROUND ARTIST’ BUIST to the address in the “from” field of this message – or simply hit your reply button. The deadline, as ever, is Wednesday afternoon for Friday’s edition. And now, as the only frame with our face in it drops to the cutting room floor, it only remains for us to remind you about…


9am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and a speaking part.

7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride to Chertsey, back via Weybridge, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team

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