DYNAMITE! #131, 02.03.07

November 20, 2010

DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #131, 02.03.07
+++ Having a blast every Friday +++ Dyna-mail race reports, news, views, and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk +++ Have a peek at our pics – http://tinyurl.com/k34tf +++ Check out DYNAMITE! on the web – http://tinyurl.com/36xkay +++ WEEKEND WEATHER: Sat, sunny intervals, 12C max, wind W 8mph; Sun, light rain, 10C max, wind SE 8mph +++

+++ Beginners’ Series sees huge turnout as Dynamo urn makes debut +++
Since its inception four years ago, the Dynamo Beginners’ Series has been offering a friendly introduction to the wonderful world of bike racing – and that welcome was even warmer on Sunday thanks to event organiser MARTIN ‘COMEBACK’ GARRATT, who served up steaming hot brews from the club’s newly-acquired urn in the heated office beneath the MoD circuit’s observation tower. What a way to tea off the season! The 167 riders who passed through the doors to sign in had the opportunity to sample DAVE ‘PINKY’ GARDNER’s delicious Genoa cake, which would have gone down a treat after getting mouthfuls of dirty rainwater sprayed up from a succession of back wheels on the sodden tarmac. It was a wet one alright – so come with us now as we re-live the first Surrey League fixture of the year and reveal how a mischievous sprite put paid to Dynamo’s chances of glory in two of the three races. Here comes that pesky puncture fairy…

+++ Weather jinxes ‘Mos +++
He notched up two second-place finishes on the MoD circuit last year and has kept his form by competing throughout the winter at Hillingdon – but unfortunately sprint sensation PAUL ‘MONTY’ DELAHUNTY was one of the many riders who pulled out of Sunday’s E/1/2/3 handicap race at Chertsey due to a flat tyre. Unlucky, pal! Cheesed-off CHARLIE ‘CHARLOTTE’ BLACKMAN also fell victim to the rain-slicked circuit when she punctured in the women’s race after getting away in the lead group of four. And not to be outdone, plucky ALEX ‘LUG PUMP’ MURRAY got a puncture in the 4th cats’ warm-up laps followed by another in the 73-strong race itself. It’s a conspiracy against the club, Dynamates! Thankfully, JASON GREEN escaped the Dynamo curse by taking 9th in the 4th cats’ traditional stampede for the line… http://tinyurl.com/2oy7mg …and JOE ‘CHEEKY BEGGAR’ STEGERS showed how to keep your saddle dry without resorting to mudguards when he turned up for marshalling duties with this ingenious device… http://tinyurl.com/29d9at. As Britain’s biggest supermarket chain would say, every little helps!

+++ Gardner’s ‘fake tan’ +++
Joe’s fantastic use of plastic was overshadowed by DAVID ‘PINKY’ GARDNER, who refused to a let the icy winds of Surrey prevent him from showing off his shaved and curiously brown pins. Dozens of shivering Dynamates were agog as the shiny-legged lad rolled up to the start of the handicap race in a pair of black Assos shorts – and NICK ‘CAPTAIN’ PEACOCK wondered aloud if Dave’s mahogany hue had come straight out of a bottle. That would be entirely sensible, given that the sizzling 2nd cat’s sustained exposure to UV rays in Mallorca last year earned him a reddish complexion and an appropriate Dyna-moniker. Perhaps it was the memory of those long training camp chats out on the road that provided his inspiration for the final laps of the 43-mile race, as he wove effortlessly through the huge bunch asking fellow ‘Mos how they were feeling, which didn’t go down too well with suffering South African STUART ‘EASY PEASY’ SPIES. Sadly, the search for a lead-out man proved fruitless, leaving Dave to settle for an anonymous bunch finish. Better luck this Sunday, pal!

+++ Silence from high-achiever Simmonds after 2nd place at TT +++
Finally, DYNAMITE! is saddened to hear no word from regular correspondent RICHARD ‘WIN ‘EM’ SIMMONDS, which we fear is all our fault. Regular readers will remember that we threatened to axe his victorious Dyna-moniker if the 1st cat fireball didn’t follow up his 2nd and 3rd places with a time trial win this week at the Redhill CC event – and he ended up getting the No.2 spot… http://tinyurl.com/38bjjc. We didn’t mean it, pal! Rich clocked 42:18 on the 19.4 mile course in Ockley, while JENNY ‘J-LLOYD’ JONES was 3rd lady with 51:40. Tell him we’re sorry, love!

The high-pitched whistle tells us that Mrs Dynamite is rustling up a brew, which means that there’s just enough time to thank everyone who sent stuff in for this issue before we sup a warming mug of Earl Grey. Always remember we are two lumps, but we would be nothing without you, our boiling hot water. So please keep Dyna-mailing your race reports, news and gossip to the address in the “from” field of this message – or simply hit your reply button. The deadline, as ever, is Wednesday afternoon for Friday’s edition. And now, as the milk is poured, it only remains for us to remind you about…


9am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, south side, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and a strainer.

7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride to Chertsey, back via Weybridge, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team.

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