DYNAMITE! #93, 31.03.06

November 20, 2010

DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #93, 31.03.06
+++ Having a blast every Friday +++ Dyna-mail news, views, and gossip to news@londondynamo.co.uk +++ Check out DYNAMITE! on the web – go to http://www.londondynamo.co.uk and click “newsletter” +++ Have a peek at our pics at http://www.londondynamo.co.uk/forum/album_personal.php?user_id=321 +++ WEEKEND WEATHER: Sat, light showers, 13C max, wind SW 15mph; Sun, sunny, 14C max, wind SW 17mph +++

Exclusive deals for London Dynamo members at CycleFit, including: 5 per cent off Serotta, Elite TT and Glider frames 10 per cent off all parts, shoes and accessories (including Sidi, Rocket 7, Polar)
20 per cent off all CycleFitting, Cardio/Fitness Testing and Sidas Custom Footbeds E-mail info@cyclefit.co.uk for details or see http://www.cyclefit.co.uk

+++ Sickness hits Dynamo ranks +++
Since its inception, this publication has been an unashamed cheerleader for each and every Dynamate, particularly those who slug it out against rival clubs in races throughout the season – so you can imagine the guilt that has wracked the editorial team this week as it prepares to jet off to a sun-kissed Mallorcan resort for the club’s training camp…


…just as a number of notable ‘Mos have either taken to their sickbed, had their legs torn off, or been involved in a crash. Contrary to what our last edition stated, ROB ‘THE SAINT’ JEFFROY retired from the 3rd cat race at Dunsfold due to a dicky tummy rather than a puncture – and genial Gen Sec NICK ‘CAPTAIN’ PEACOCK fell prey to a stomach bug on Wednesday which ruled him out of Barcombe. Rising star RICHARD ‘WIN ‘EM’ SIMMONDS also skipped Sunday’s lumpy 62-miler after catching a death of cold the day before at Eastway – more of which later – and leather lover HUW ‘AITCH’ WATKINS scuffed his Rapha retro mitts after the bunch squeezed past an oncoming car, causing him to come off in the final lap of the wet West Sussex event. It never rains but it pours! The mud-spattered race was won by Martin Markowski of Bayeux Landscapes, and Dynamo’s up-and-coming Aussie MICHAEL ‘LORD BE PRAISED’ SNEYD managed to salvage some glory for the club when he took 9th…


…while Rob narrowly missed out on the points by finishing two places behind him in the strung-out threes contest. Unlucky, pal! At roughly the same time in Yoxhall, Staffs, shagged-out GUY ‘THE ENGINE’ POWDRILL mysteriously ran out of gas at the frenetic 1/2/3 Royal Sutton RR – and now you have the opportunity to come with us to Valley End, Surrey, as we reveal how another Dynamo big-hitter suffered woes of his own. Get ready to feel as sick as a parrot…

+++ Dynamette comes to Paine’s aid in clothing crisis +++
Master of understatement IAN ‘KING OF’ PAINE admits that “things did not exactly go to plan” at the Hounslow Spring RR on Sunday after he turned up to enter on the line and realised his shorts weren’t in his kit bag. Doh! The 1st cat fireball, who scraped a place on the starting line as the 11th of eleven reserves, was forced to sit around in his boxers while kind Dynamette LUCY ‘DEMURE’ DOVE drove back home to get him a spare pair and returned minutes before the race began. Then, at barely five miles into the E/1/2 race, Ian punctured. He revealed: “It was a very slow change, but nothing that three miles at 45mph courtesy of a helping hand from the PCA team car’s window couldn’t sort out!” His day of distress drew to a close when he missed the main split with about 30 miles to go, leaving him to roll in at the back of the bunch with Lucy’s fella TOM ‘HUMBLE’ HEMMANT. Better luck next time, pal!

+++ Eastway sees another placing for Simmonds +++
He’s done it again! Ascendant Dynamo star RICHARD ‘WIN ‘EM’ SIMMONDS racked up more points at the weekend by coming 6th at the second South East RR League event at Eastway…


The feisty rider, who jumped across to the winning seven-man break with about eight laps gone, says: “God knows how we managed to stay away. As a unit we seemed about as effective as a UN peacekeeping force. I actually had a sore throat from the amount of shouting I was doing trying to get the group to work. Scary when you think they’re 2nd cats!” The circuit turned slippery once the heavens opened with 15 miles to go, and the bunch had the breakaway in their sights – so Rich attacked on the hill, only to get caught and lead out the sprint to the finish of the 2/3/4 race which was won by Rapha/Condor ‘s Dominic Gabelini. “All in all,” Richard says, “I was pretty happy with 6th place.” But once over the line, he began shivering uncontrollably. He reveals: “A couple of hours later I was wrapped up in a fleece in bed feeling like I had flu.” Somehow, we don’t think he’s going to be out of action for long!

+++ Buist sweats it out +++
Spring has sprung – and the slight increase in temperature has caught out Dynamo’s favourite slippery Kiwi KEN ‘LEGGINGS’ BUIST. Eagle-eyed MARTIN ‘COMEBACK’ GARRATT spotted the reclusive ‘Mo ferociously powering down Bagley’s Lane in Fulham wearing a full blue Assos jumpsuit. Martin comments: “Over-layered and over-angry – that’s our Ken!” You can say that again!

+++ He’s out of danger +++
Finally, PAUL ‘ALL-BLUE’ HARKNETT has reported that CRAIG LEIPER is on the mend and has been back on his bike following a nasty crash on Wednesday 22nd – but sadly he won’t be coming on the training camp. We wish him a speedy recovery…


+++ Watch out rival 2nd cats – speedy DAVID ‘DORIAN’ STREULE showed off his super-fast carbon Time machine outside the café after the Parkride on Saturday +++ Famous British architect rumoured to have joined Dynamo – more news as we get it +++ Unlucky JAMES ‘CURSES’ KINMONT punctures… while on his turbo +++

We hope we have delivered just the tonic to get you through the week, which means there’s just time to thank everyone for their contributions this week before we shut up the pharmacy. Always remember we are the medicine but you are the spoonful of sugar, so please keep Dyna-mailing your news, gossip, and further sightings of the elusive KEN ‘BENYLIN’ BUIST to news@londondynamo.co.uk – or simply hit your reply button if you are reading this on e-mail. As DYNAMITE! is currently in Mallorca for the training camp, the next newsletter will be greatly reduced and the deadline has been moved to Wednesday 5th April for the edition after next. And now, as the Tixylix trickles down your throat, it only remains for us to remind you about…


9am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and a dose of Dextromethorphan.

7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride to Chertsey, back via Weybridge, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team.

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