The DYNAMITE! Files

DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #77, 21.10.05

BONKED OUT
During a rare Dyna-matic drinking session some time ago at the Duke of York pub in Theobalds Road, Dynamo’s quiet man TOM ‘HUMBLE’ HEMMANT commented on how much he enjoyed reading our weekly update on the capital’s busiest cycle squad before wondering when the newsletter team would be left with absolutely nothing to write about. How fanciful the idea seemed in July 2004! With WARRICK ‘SPEEDY’ SPENCE coming 2nd at the frenetic 50-mile Cycle Show crit on Sunday, not to mention RUSSELL ‘RUSTY’ SHORT securing his best cross result yet with a hard-fought 5th place in East Grinstead, it would be inaccurate to claim this week’s cupboard is completely bare. But these impressive results aside, it’s fair to say the former Solna Avenue resident’s long-standing prediction of information depletion has finally come true. We’ve bonked, buddies! We’re down to the metaphorical 27 sprocket and there are no more carbs in the tank. The legs have gone. The bidons are drained. The bottle cages are empty. The mouthpiece of Dynamo is dried up and foaming. The gloopy gels are now just crumpled wrappers discarded on a Surrey roadside, and after much mastication, the chewy energy bars have been reduced to nothing more than a sickly aftertaste. It’s a bittersweet sensation, Dynamates! But perhaps it’s more accurate to say that in the race for headlines, the starting gun of fact has not been fired this week. Or maybe it could be argued that the pedals of reportage are frantically spinning up Current Affairs hill, but the chain of events is sadly missing. In any case, it’s becoming clear that the shifters of this edition are moving but the information derailleur is stuck fast and in desperate need of a lubricating dollop of gossip. Then again, it could be more accurate to compare this periodical to a hub with the reader being the rim and both parts wheely needing the absent spokes of Dynamo-related data to unite them. What we’re trying to say is that the seatpost of truth is clamped on, but the saddle of communication has fallen off. The ergonomic carbon bars look flash, yet the tape hasn’t been wrapped on. The HRM is strapped to the bike, but the sensor is on the blink. So to keep the heartbeat of Dynamo going strong, please keep Dyna-mailing your news, gossip, and further sightings of the elusive KEN ‘ELECTROMAGNETIC’ BUIST to news@londondynamo.co.uk – or simply hit your reply button if you are reading this on e-mail. The deadline, as ever, is Wednesday afternoon for Friday’s edition. And now, as we reach the end of this long-winded motif, it only remains for us to remind you about…

THIS WEEK’S RIDES

SATURDAY
9am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

SUNDAY
8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and some news.

WEDNESDAY
7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride into Surrey, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team.

THE SMALL PRINT
SUNDAY, OCTOBER 16 – CYCLE 2005 CRITERIUM, EXCEL LONDON, E/1/2/3, 51KM: 1 Karl Freeman (VC Pontievy); 2 WARRICK SPENCE (LONDON DYNAMO); 3 Martin Smith (Team Milton Keynes); 4 James Taylor (sportscoaching.com); 5 Vince Halpern (Twickenham); 6 Ian Holt (Vinerbikes/Agisko Sports Nutrition); 7 Jason Edwards (Ewhurst Control Wildside/TWRC); 8 Simon Cope (Pacific Racing); 9 David Coulson (JE James); 10 Gerry Bowditch (Ritchey/Cycleops); 11 Christian Tune (Vinerbikes/Agisko Sports Nutrition) 12 Adam Norris (Crest/Ilford); 13 SEAN HANNEBERRY (LONDON DYNAMO); 14 David Sinclair (i-team.co.uk); 15 Lee Day (Liphook Cycles); 16 Rudie Marais (Archer); 17 GUY POWDRILL (LONDON DYNAMO); 18 Henry Furniss (Ride Beyond/Bike and Run); 19 Matt Seaton (VC Londres).

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 16 – LONDON CYCLO CROSS LEAGUE, ROUND 5, DEERS LEAP PARK, EAST GRINSTEAD, SENIORS/JUNIORS/VETS/WOMEN: 1 Steve Hambling (VC Deal) 1:00:24; 2 Ben Lockwood (GS Invicta) 1:00:44; 3 Brian Curtis (Corridori) 1:02:04; 4 Craig Steven (PCA/Ciclos Uno) 1:02:40; 5 Steve Dennis (East Grinstead) 1:02:55; 6 RUSSELL SHORT (LONDON DYNAMO) 1:04:44; 7 Phil Watkins (Addiscombe) 1:03:52; 8 Matt Holmes (Arctic/Shorter Rochford) 1:04:44; 9 Jon Sharpe (USE/Alien) 1:04:54; 10 Ben Spurrier (Evans) 1:05:03; 47 Tony M (VCDeal).

THE LAST WORD
“It is common for those that ‘bonk’ to be crying, unable to even lift an arm, and an hour later, after a meal, be leading a pace line at 20 miles per hour.”

This entry was posted on November 21, 2010 at 1:06 am and is filed under DYNAMITE! filed.