DYNAMITE! #105, 23.06.06

November 20, 2010

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DYNAMITE! The OFFICIAL London Dynamo Newsletter #105, 23.06.06
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+++ Having a blast every Friday +++ Dyna-mail race reports, news, views, and gossip to dynamite@londondynamo.co.uk +++ Have a peek at our pics – http://tinyurl.com/ppkxg +++ Check out DYNAMITE! on the web – go to http://www.londondynamo.co.uk and click the “newsletter” link +++ WEEKEND WEATHER: Sat, sunny intervals, 23C max, wind SW 7mph; Sun, sunny intervals, 21C max, wind NW 6mph +++
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JUST NET FAIR
+++ Unaccountably popular sporting event keeps marshals at home +++
When it’s not wading through the reams of brilliant Dynamo results spewing from the fabled ticker tape machine, this periodical’s editorial team spends most of the day re-watching all 15 volumes of Sean Kelly: King Of Comedy on DVD while surrounded by signed posters of 1963 Milk Race stage winner Keith Butler – but this week DYNAMITE! was reliably informed that the world outside of its famous soundproof bunker in the bowels of Dynamo Towers is engrossed in another sport altogether. Sounds fanciful? Well brace yourselves, Dynamates, because apparently the nation’s mental wellbeing currently rests on the abstract notion of 11 celebrity husbands and boyfriends shunting a leather bag of air around a German stadium. We thought this was pure fiction until we emerged blinking from our hermetic HQ and travelled to Crystal Palace, where the race organisers were left scrabbling around for marshals after Tuesday’s host club decided they were staying at home to watch the Global Soccer Cup, or whatever it’s called. Honestly – the cheek of some people! Thankfully, a number of riders agreed to do the job so the races could go ahead – which was just as well, because a certain hirsute ‘Mo ended up hairing around the tricky 1km circuit to score his best result of the year so far. So come with us to south east London and celebrate the lad with the long locks getting one in the back of the net. Here comes a mighty ‘Moxican wave…

SHORTCUT TO SUCCESS
+++ Unstoppable break mysteriously slips past pack at Palace +++
Where on earth is he? That’s what diligent domestique ANDREW ‘COALFACE’ STRONGE might well have been wondering as he soft-pedalled at the front of the pack and policed the breaks to let team-mate ROB ‘THE SAINT’ JEFFROY extend his lead at Crystal Palace. Unbeknownst to Andrew, the safety-conscious race organisers allowed the five-strong break to use the “slip road” in front of the signing-in desk to pass the main group during the 23-mile 3/4 race – which meant the bunch didn’t even realise they’d been lapped! Shortly after ponytailed Rob romped across the line to claim 5th, compact mechanic SAM ‘SLAM DUNK’ HUMPHESON nabbed the No.6 spot in the E/1/2 event… http://tinyurl.com/l96fu …which was ample compensation for getting dropped from the break. The self-styled “thrilla from Herne Hill-a” whizzed off afterwards with barely a word to DYNAMITE! as he wanted to “catch the second half”. What on earth was he talking about?

YOU BLUE IT
+++ Harknett misses out on Brighton run +++
Social secretary PAUL ‘ALL-BLUE’ HARKNETT was another ‘Mo who was dropped this week – and he never even got to see the pack at the start. The early bird turned up at East Sheen at 5.15am on Sunday to meet SAM ‘SPORTIF’ WOODHOUSE for a Marmotte training run to Brighton organised by the Pearson crew – but he couldn’t find his fellow Dynamo committee member at their designated meeting place. The anxious Axiom rider tried unsuccessfully to call Sam and hung around for a while before asking someone at a nearby cashpoint for the time. Paul reveals: “He confirmed the worst. I had accidentally touched a button on the side of my alarm clock, putting it back an hour – a handy device once a year.” Whoops! As a penance, he went on the 8am Surrey Hills ride and did four laps of Richmond Park, clocking up 110 miles. Sam, meanwhile, kept up with the thumping pace of the 40-strong group and had a slap-up feed at the Regency café on Brighton seafront before heading back. Hope you brought a bacon butty back for Paul, mate!

WEALD-ING POWER
+++ Hayter’s race knowledge pays off +++
Meanwhile, over in Kent, keen tactician WILL ‘SEE YA’ HAYTER lived up to his Dyna-moniker by saying “cheerio” to the pack at the Sevenoaks Weald 3/4 road race. The MTB maestro had been part of a successful break when he raced the course earlier this season – and he repeated the formula on Sunday by attacking up the drag on the second of nine laps with five other riders. The heat got to Will, who admits: “I felt like I was riding through treacle on legs made of lead when it came to the sprint.” But he nevertheless managed to stay away with the leading group to take 4th in the 62-mile event… http://tinyurl.com/p8cme. Nice one!

IN IT TO WINNAT
+++ Trek through famous Peak District pass for Polka Dot quartet +++
Committee member SAM ‘SPORTIF’ WOODHOUSE sent us this pic… http://tinyurl.com/18r …taken shortly after his triumphant finish of the epic 106-mile Polka Dot Challenge, which took place three weeks ago. Sam, pictured right, tackled eight major climbs, including the dreaded Winnats Pass, finishing in 6hrs 22mins. He says of the event, which starts in South Manchester: “We got lots of amazed comments that we had come up from London.” That’s the effect the glamorous blue, black and orange livery has on others!

THAT REE-LY HURT
+++ Former prez and Simmonds felled in West Sussex +++
Finally, DYNAMITE! would like to send a brief get-well-soon message to former club president Guy Andrews, who came down in the 1/2/3 Giles Ree Memorial in Warninglid, West Sussex, on Sunday. The Dynamo founder member, now riding for Rapha, was taken to hospital after another rider snagged their jersey on someone else’s bike while trying to get past on a fast descent. The crash also brought down RICHARD ‘WIN ‘EM’ SIMMONDS, but 18th-placed GUY ‘THE ENGINE’ POWDRILL… http://tinyurl.com/nez6k …reports that the point-gobbling marvel got off relatively lightly. So there’s no excuse for hopping back on your bike and getting that Elite license pronto, pal!

…AND A FEW ‘MO THINGS…
+++ Last chance to confirm your attendance at the Summer Social – send a Dyna-mail to the address in the “from” field of this message if you want to come to the Guinea… http://tinyurl.com/gcdqj …at 6.15pm on Thursday, with pizzas from 8pm +++ Triathlete KIMBERLY ‘CANUCK’ KABATOFF finished 15th out of 46 in her age group at the UK Ironman 70.3 on Sunday, notching up 12th best bike time of 3hrs 44mins over hilly 90km course +++ JOHN WITTS completed the 127-mile Quebrantahuesos sportive in the Spanish Pyrenees with a time of 8hrs 15mins, finishing 3,781 overall among the 8,000-odd field. His 72-year-old pal Dave Stanton clocked 8hrs 50mins, making him 4,785 overall +++

FINAL WHISTLE
You think it’s all over, well it is now, which means there’s just time to thank everyone who contributed to this issue before we head to the communal showers. Always remember that we are that entertaining chap who does robotic dancing and looks a bit like MARTIN ‘COMEBACK’ GARRATT, but we would be nothing without you, the talented potato-faced Merseysider who loves his grannies. So please keep Dyna-mailing your race reports, news, gossip, and further sightings of the elusive KEN ‘HAND OF GOD’ BUIST to the address in the “from” field of this message – or simply hit your reply button. The deadline, as ever, is Wednesday afternoon for Friday’s edition. And now, as the crowds shuffling out of the stadium mutter “we woz robbed”, it only remains for us to remind you about…

THIS WEEK’S RIDES

SATURDAY
9am: The Parkride. Richmond Park, roundabout by Sheen Gate. Four laps split into fast, intermediate and steady groups.

SUNDAY
8am: Kingston Gate, Richmond Park. Non-stop ride through Surrey Hills.

9am: Hampton Court bridge, Surrey Hills ride. Fifty-ish miles at a steady pace. Stop at Box Hill for tea and cake. Bring a pump, inner tubes, drink, and a season ticket.

WEDNESDAY
7.30pm: Richmond Gate, Richmond Park. Steady ride to Chertsey, back via Weybridge, 28 miles.

So until next week, Dynamates, goodbye and happy riding.

The DYNAMITE! team.

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